A lie

To think that I trusted you. It was a chilly night. My hands, though not numb, were shuddering. The steady hum of my laptop provided ambiance to my thoughts. A notification bell shatters the silence and my hands once again set off on their dance across the keyboard. They are my messengers, telling the world what I think, what I feel. But to allow someone to see my thoughts, I have to let them see me at my most vulnerable. To confide is to trust. I have been warned against trusting before. Lots of hurt feelings come from trusting the wrong person. They let you give and give and give and give only to manipulate and break and shatter later. But I continue giving regardless, hoping that one day my trust will find its way to the right person. Should’ve known better then not to give it at night. My thoughts are at their wildest then, jumping from train to train with reckless abandon. They rip my filters away and scream, “free ! finally free from forty filters !” For during the day I place my thoughts under lock and key. But tonight I let them frolic. I was punished heavily for it. It was just one question. One question was all it took. She told me no, but I still insisted that I was right. I’m right on the things that matter. She told me that before. I trusted her then too. I push forward. “no no no no no” she reiterated over and over. That’s it. In a fury, my fingers once again fly, but they no longer dance. The messengers have been given their orders, and they execute them will feverish fervor. “Do frogs eat fish?” they cry into the void. And then the blessed answer pops up on the screen. “Yes”. LIES LIES LIES LIES. SHE LIED TO ME. There is no greater betrayal. My trust thrown to the side like trash, like its owner. I grab my filters and swallow them whole, like a frog does a fish. No more trusting. From now on, I shall swallow my words, like a frog does a fish.